Many apologies for our absence! What can we say other than we were seriously busy in the run up to the Retreat - which was amazing in case you hadn't heard! Since then we have both been under the weather, which has slowed us up a bit. There has also been the loss of my dog and the addition of a puppy who is adorable - but wow - do you know he is here! Let's just say he is a time thief, but pets give us so much in the long run, don't they? So, that is why we have been quieter than usual, but we wanted to share a few thoughts before we head into the Christmas season too much further.
In the few moments when the puppy is finally asleep I have found time to watch "I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!" and I have really enjoyed this season. For me, it was so nice to see people feel able to be authentic and make genuine connections. Those who have watched it will have noticed how much more has been shared so openly this year, and how each has spoken about feeling a sense of safety within camp. One of them mentioned feeling sad to leave as they felt so held and contained by the people there.
I thought about what had allowed that to happen for them in a way that we haven't seen before. With men and women equally feeling able to share their stories about grief, loss, pain, trauma and heartbreak. Being able to show emotion and be offered comfort and support. I think it was in part the nature of the people, but also a lot to do with the fact that people had an open mind, comments such as "I am human first and .... second" say a lot about where someone is. It is also something Geraldine says - A LOT!
I think having a journalist (Jane Moore) who knew how to help people share to start with made a big difference too. She used open questions, offered gentle encouragement to keep exploring with people and no judgement - thus creating an environment where people felt free to talk. Another factor was really well summarised by a campmate when they said "it was safe to talk, because no one had to rush off, no one had anywhere to be." Isn't that the kind of listening we could all use?
I wonder what it would be like for us all to have a space where we could all feel this kind of containment and safety?
"Human being first, counsellor second, Geraldine here!"
THAT'S COUNSELLING, surely?! A safe space where your feelings are contained and you are allowed to BE, without judgement? Or, yes, okay that's a dream relationship/friendship (I haven't been in the jungle, like C!) Something we can perhaps aim for having / offering to our loved ones. And with 'the most wonderful time of the year' (!!!!!!) fast approaching; boy, could we all do with some of those relationships in our lives where we can JUST BE!?!
Christmas, historically for me, hasn't been like that in all areas of my life; guilt, blame and drama enters stage right WHAT LARKS! It can be hard to stay "Adult" when the people in your life are trying to pull you into other roles.
How do you cope? What do you do to get through? After I have survived the guilt, blame and drama for another year I will immerse myself in Miranda Hart's book (which my husband has duly noted is what I would like!!) and sit myself down with my favourite tunes in my ear, and with my most favoured tipple (it is Christmas after all...!)
I'm told that Ms Hart writes a lot about her inner child, which is a very neat segue back to Retreat 2025...(seamless, hey!)
'The Inner World' is next year's theme, we look at inner children, teens, parents and critics. We look at how to understand them, value them, learn from them and heal them where they are wounded. Please take a look on our Retreats page for more details. We are running our Early Bird offer until the end of January - so why not make it your gift to yourself for next year?
Whatever this season means for you, however you are planning on spending it, we both wish you peace and good wishes. Take good care of yourselves, make time for what gives you joy and may only positive things come your way in 2025!
G and C
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